To you from me

When i feel strongly about a person, it's hard for me to get my words out. inside i know exactly how i feel, but when i have to translate the feelings in my heart to the words in my mouth it wont come out. Maybe your right .. maybe i am scared. i don't think i am .. but the more i look at it . I hesitate when i wanna let you know something, i know i shouldn't but i do. I know it's because of how i feel about you. No one in my life has ever treated me so well or made so much sense about what they felt. Most people don't give you reasons on why they feel a certain way , you couldn't stop telling me how you felt. I love how your so comfortable with telling me this, and i don't want you to think i'm not.. i just want to KNOW .. you know . i believe i do but i'm scared to .. i think the reason i'm scared is cause i don't have control over it. I trust you .. and trust is a big thing to me . cause i don't do that right off the back and if i do... i question it. i don't question you .. at all. When your around me , no matter how mad i might get ... that doesn't change how i feel about you .. i still like you the same way and if not .. more.I'm just not used to someone being like this towards me.you make my freaking hands sweat.. and they only do that around you .. its weird. When i think about you theres an instant smile even when i don't know. I feel that i've breaking down my "wall' for you ... no one has came close to doing that in a year .. people have had so much to say about you and i and no matter what they have said i have stuck by what i think about you .And you know how mayne was saying all girls have a plan b.. that might be true. but i don't .. why would i need to be with any other guy all i want in a guy is you? i don't need thousands of opinions from people to know your not like any one i have ever met. I have put you through so much stuff and i ask my self why everyday why is he still here? my words will probably never explain how i feel about you .. but i'm hoping time will. you know that feeling you get when your nervous butterflies i guess thats what its called. but they haven't went away. one of the main reasons i said i didn't really love Ryan was cause love is not fear, love is not control. love is respect and trust, a person is supposed to be in your life to make you happy. you respect me as i respect you, you trust me as i trust you, and you damn sure make me happy. I accept things about you that some people might not.i care about you more then you'll ever think. I was even considering on not going to prom because the only person i wanted to share that night with was you and i was not willing to accept anyone else.you might not think so but i am willing to give it all to you. mentally, physically, and emotionally. I just don't think of you as a boyfriend, your more than that to me , more than a best friend, i would consider you like family almost. i tell you things i don't tell Halley and Deniqua.. i look forward to you each and everyday.. and just to think of you now as not being there in my life .. is not possible. i can't help to think of everything we've been through. i think we were meant to be together . your all i desire. i know your not my first in most things but i can say your the first to make me this happy as i am now _*_