i refuse to suffocate

Friday, August 26, 2011

The public.

More and more each day i realize how the world really is. I used to be so naive to how people can be, i used to always try and find the good in people reguardless of what they have done or will do. I realized i am a good person and people realize that and because of that i get taken advantage of, and yes i have no one to blame but my self. It's hard because that's my personality, i feel like i have to be there for someone , it makes me feel good helping people. Maybe because i know how it is to not have someone there, so i'm always willing to help. BUT LATELY enough is enough. People seem so needy lately and idk if its me and how my attitude has been ..but i've realized people are so damn rude..ignorant, and selfish. i hate only seeing the ugly in people ..it's depressing. I have 3 jobs now two that i've been working for a while and all my jobs deal with the public.. the people.. the customers. I understand that not everyone is going to be the nicest, but the way you treat people everyday can make a big difference. Like for example.. saying thank you, or please.. USE YOUR MANNERS. I get annoyed with people to the point i'm starting to hate the public...like hate HATE HATE HATE. There should be ways you treat people.. i wish people would stop and think hmmmm "idk what this person is going through.. they might not have control over certain situations so let me be polite and try and work this out because this problem is not the end of the world so i'm going to treat this person with respect just like they did me because they are human just like me." I feel as if i dont owe you anything and nor does anyone else owe me anything .. but respect should be given in any situation especially if your getting respected. I just feel as if i give soo much sometimes and i dont get anything back.. im trying to have control over it.. and i dont know if im doing the right thing but im starting to become more and more selfish everyday.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

it be like that sometimes

SUMMER 2011

ima little on the late side

well i did all i could and gave all i had, but no matter how perfect someone is or was for you , sometimes you have to do whats better for your self , cause i cant keep myself and keep you too. I have nothing bad to say besides age can really matter sometimes. Maybe if he was on a different level more of a mature level and he didnt have a block in his head .. things woulda been actually perfect. In this stage in my life i cant have someone bring me down. We clicked so well .. friends? ehhh i dont know. All i know is im making choices that i feel will improve my life and i didnt see you in that plan with the things you were doing... youll realize the mistakes in the long run... i dont have the time to teach someone how to treat me. i need a person the comes with the package.. and even though i didnt expect to fine something that fits me soo soon.. i might have. But i gotta still observe the waters. hmmmm well i guess my quest is still on. I learn something new about my heart each day :)